The process of letting go of a manuscript is a lot like sending a child into the world.
I’ve done it a number of times (manuscripts AND children) and it doesn’t get any easier.
I sent a manuscript to my editor this week; a book I’ve been researching and writing for nearly two years.
It’s close to my heart.
I can’t believe it’s gone.
But it is.
Here’s how letting go of my manuscript reminded me of letting go of my children.
Am I really done?
When I put my first child on the school bus long ago, my heart leaped.
He was old enough to go, happy to climb the bus and greet the driver.
But I bit back my words, “wait! I haven’t taught you everything you need to know yet.”
He grinned at me and waved.
The door swung shut.
It’s the same with this manuscript I’ve groomed and edited and read and run spellcheck and sighed over.
Have I put in everything it needs?
I hope so.
Who will care as much as me?
No one.
That’s a fact of life.
Oh, maybe my husband will care because he has to live with me and my–face it–grief over releasing my child and my book into the world.
But he didn’t carry either in his heart or under his skin like I have.
My mom friends get it and will sympathize. So will my writer friends.
It’s nice some people understand!
Can I trust others with my child or book?
That’s the eternal mother question about letting go.
Will the teacher appreciate how brilliant, charming and sweet my boy is?
Will the editor love my book?
Maybe.
Is that good enough?
It has to be.
If I’m letting go, is my job done?
Of course not.
I still love and advise my children and would love to keep them safe all the time.
But they are their own people now with their own lives and families.
My task of preparing them for life is done.
I’ll love them and be interested in them forever.
They may do things that make no sense to me, but their choices and decisions belong to them.
My book is in the editor’s hands now.
The editor will make changes–and will consult me–but I’ve finished my research and most of my writing work.
I’ll love it (and the subjects) forever, but it’s time for the book to make its own way into the world.
It will stand on its own merits.
But I doubt I’ll ever stop talking about or telling stories about my children or my book!
How will letting go change me–and my child or manuscript?
Pieces of my heart and life are out in the world.
Some people will love them, others will not.
It’s out of my hands now, except to rejoice over the good and weep over the bad.
I’m thankful for the opportunity to raise four children and publish eight books.
I’m wiser, kinder, more sympathetic and appreciative.
I listen more.
But it’s always hard letting go of something you love, isn’t it?
Tweetables
Letting go–of a manuscript or a child–is hard. Click to Tweet
Writing and child rearing–exercises in letting go. Click to Tweet
The similarities of letting a manuscript and a child out into the world. Click to Tweet
nlbrumbaugh says
Congratulations, Michelle. Another milestone accomplished. The letting go and sense of loss is something I’ve experienced, too. You’ve done what you can do, and that’s that. There’s joy in it, too. I’m happy for you.
sunshine758 says
Michelle, I really felt your mixed emotions and they became my emotions too. I have followed your blog about getting this book published and I can’t wait to read it. But look at it as a new child without having to change diapers. I’ve never published a book but I can feel your joy. I’m sure you will let us know when it will be published. Keep writing, Gilda
Michelle Ule says
Thank you, Norma and Gilda, both. Laughing at your responses. I’m frankly, in some sort of withdrawal–a friend has advised me to step away from the computer . . . ! Tomorrow I’ll clean the office and put the books and papers away. Life goes on, just as it did when the children left home–and returns with completely different blessings. God is good, always, and writing this book by following His lead has been almost extraordinary experience.
The next writing task after the Christmas letter (!) is to write the story of HOW Mrs. Oswald Chambers came to be written and the amazing things that God brought into my life at just the perfect time. I’ll be serializing it in my newsletter–shifting to monthly in January–to get the stories out there.
God is good. Blessings to you both.