How do you cultivate a thankful heart?
I’ve spent a lot of time this year choosing to be thankful, rather than dwelling on my disappointments.
It took a while.
But I got there.
Here are four ways to cultivate–to nourish–a thankful heart.
Choose to be thankful
A bitter, disappointed person isn’t fun to be around.
I had prayed about my situation, assumed all would be wonderful, and then didn’t like the answer.
I could choose to be miserable and bitter–and I sunk into that from time to time–but I knew I didn’t want to stay there.
Who wants to spend time with someone who is always negative?
Who wants to hear about my sense of entitlement being swiped?
Not me.
So, I determined to find things to be thankful for, even in the midst of my disappointment.
The Bible tells us to do just that:
in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
1 Thessalonians 5:18 NKJV
I practiced. And the more I chose to be thankful, the more thankful I felt.
You can say it became a habit!
Don’t compare yourself to others
So often we become unthankful because we are looking at our circumstances and then at someone else’s. Their situation always seems better–which breeds discontent.
Author Madeleine L’Engle had something to say about that:
I must not worry about comparisons between great and small. I used to irritate my children by frequently quoting [Christopher] Marlowe: “Comparisons are odious.”
Madeleine L’Engle Herself: Reflections on a Writing Life
Jesus agreed.
Speaking to Peter at the end of John’s Gospel:
This He spoke, signifying by what death he [Peter] would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.” . . .
Peter, seeing him [John], said to Jesus, “But Lord, what about this man?”
John 21: 19, 21-22
Jesus said to him, “If I will that he remain till I come, what is that to you? You follow Me.”
God had one plan for Peter, another for John.
The same is true of you and me. I need to cultivate gratitude for what God is doing with my life without comparing it to yours.
Bless other people
As above, comparisons don’t work. God has plans for each of and what works for one person won’t work for another.
But, we can bless other people and, as in Romans 12:15, “rejoice with those who rejoice.”
Rejoicing with others, being thankful for their good fortune, encourages our thankful hearts–as long as we genuinely rejoice.
Celebrating and being thankful for one person’s good fortune can encourage us to be thankful–if we don’t return to those odious comparisons!.
Max Lucado on the September 20 Eric Metaxas Show, in discussing his new book, How Happiness Happens, noted, “we become happier people when we help other people.”
The same things work with thankfulness. Be thankful for someone else’s situation and it will cheer you up, too!
Turn a twinge to thankfulness
Because I had determined to not be disappointed or bitter, whenever I had a twinge of negativity, I chose to pray.
I returned to that 1 Thessalonians verse and chose to ignore the envy, thanked God for what He had given me.
Every twinge reminded me to express gratitude to God.
Soon it became enough of a habit, that ingratitude faded.
Cultivating a thankful heart resulted in a lighter attitude, a genuine smile, and a marveling soul.
Such is the will for those who are in Christ Jesus: giving thanks in everything.
Tweetables
How to cultivate a thankful heart. Click to Tweet
4 suggestions for encouraging thankfulness and not bitterness. Click to Tweet
Things are all so very fatal
but it’s thankfulness I choose,
for how could one be ungrateful
with Labby on the loose?
He’s big and black and cheery,
the retriever archetype,
and never’s he too weary
to photo-bomb my Skype.
You’ll see a big black-magic flash,
and then a happy nose,
and then, perhaps, hear a splash
like a full-on garden hose.
“Hey, world, I’m on TV!
I’m so excited, have to pee!”
Actually, Andrew, I think you HAVE cultivated thankfulness during these trying years and I admire your fortitude. xoxo
Every night I pause and write down at least one thing to be thankful for that day. It might be as simple as the happy big yellow flowers growing in the river beds after the late summer rains