A child’s mind is such a puzzle at times!
Years ago I read about learning styles–the ways people learn best.
We’re each created differently with strengths, weaknesses, inclinations, and talents. The way you learn is singular to you.
I was interested in figuring out how my particular group of children learned best–so I knew how to engage them with their education.
That exercise proved very helpful over the years. I discovered that just because I learn things best a certain way doesn’t mean that will work for them–or you.
It also explains why I may prefer a certain type of music, book, or movie.
It’s not right or wrong, it’s just my preference.
How a child’s mind tried to work a puzzle.
I recently remembered learning styles while working on a 100-piece puzzle with a three-year-old girl.
I always start by sorting the pieces–edge pieces there, and particular colored or type of pieces in a different pile.
Once sorted, I put the frame together and then fill in the middle.
Working on a puzzle with a small child, younger than five, can be an adventure.
The three-year-old tried any piece, not noticing if it was an edge or not.
All she seemed to see was indentation and tabs/knobs that might fit.
Working with her resulted in a lot of bent pieces and a frustrated child.
We switched to a smaller puzzle–20 pieces–and that went a lot easier. (Most of the pieces were edges!)
She smashed them together, “there,” and we were done.
Lego and a child’s mind
One of my children has a mind that can visualize in both three and four dimensions.
Albert Einstein could do that, too. Hence, he was able to figure out the General Theory of Relativity.
His brain simply worked differently.
Our son got his start with Lego, moved on to Construx, and thence to three-dimensional puzzles.
He also walked through a New Zealand labyrinth in about 20 minutes.
After two hours spent waving at me as I vainly tried to get out of the same maze (he was having a drink in the center and could see me walking around), he pointed me toward an exit.
We’re well-matched, however, on regular jigsaw puzzles.
As a proud mother today, I can’t imagine how he does his job.
He’s a metal fabricator. He writes computer programs to maneuver huge metal pieces through the air to build things I cannot describe.
My child’s mind–his adult mind–imagines where cuts and holes need to be placed, and then writes a computer program that does it.
Amazing.
But what about the state of their bedrooms?
As they grew up and I learned more about learning styles, I realized we didn’t think alike.
I needed things organized, the floor picked up, and the books on the shelves.
(Okay, I do stack papers all over the place. But they’re STACKED.)
Their rooms–whether shared or not–drove me crazy.
But, if one of them was constructing something, who was I to tell them to take it apart and put the pieces away?
If one of them wanted to study while listening to music, wasn’t that their business?
(Just because I wouldn’t remember anything that way, didn’t mean they wouldn’t.)
If they did fine in school without me having to remind them to do their homework, why not leave them alone?
I finally came up with one rule, well three.
- Make your bed every day.
- Put away your clean clothes.
- Pick up the floor once a month so it could be vacuumed
I also learned to close their bedroom doors when I thought it was too messy.
They lived there.
They needed to figure out what worked for them.
Training a child’s mind
I saw my parental role as being a facilitator and a trainer.
(Pretty grand descriptions for “mom,” aren’t they?)
I started giving them puzzles early–18 months.
They built with blocks, spent as much time outside in the dirt as possible, and visited the library regularly.
Cooking, of course, is simplified chemistry–all that pouring and measuring.
(They’re all good cooks now).
I tried to remember to ask them leading questions, rather than demand they explain why.
(Photo by Ant Rozetsky on Unsplash)
Try it:
- “Can you tell me why you chose to do it that way?
- “What do you plan to do next?”
- “I don’t quite understand. Can you show me what you’re doing here?”
It was fun to catch them by surprise and watch their brains suddenly realize they needed a next step!
Unpuzzling the kids?
Where’s the fun in that?
While it’s certainly easier if you can predict and/or control a child’s imagination or behavior, we’re all made differently.
If we all thought and acted the same, most of us would be superfluous.
Once I learned to appreciate how different the children thought, the easier it was to sit back and watch them soar.
God created each of us with gifts, talents, and abilities to use.
My job as a mother was to give the children the tools they needed to become the people God created them to be.
Even if I can’t picture what they do with my puzzled mind.
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