Do you use sarcasm in your Christian life?
Do you see it around you?
Why do I ask?
I think it’s a major problem for several reasons.
Definitions: Sarcasm and Cynicism
Sarcasm definition:
A cutting, often ironic remark intended to express contempt or ridicule.
A form of wit characterized by the use of such remarks.
Biting taunt or gibe, or the use of such a taunt; a bitter, cutting expression; a satirical remark or expression, uttered with scorn or contempt; in rhetoric, a form of irony; bitter irony.
American Heritage Dictionary, 5th edition
And, while I’m at it, cynicism:
An attitude of scornful or jaded negativity, especially a general distrust of the integrity or professed motives of others.
A scornfully or jadedly negative comment or act.
American Heritage Dictionary, 5th edition
Should the above definitions reflect the heart attitude of a person who purports to love God?
Fruits of the spirit anyone?
The Bible is clear on what our heart attitudes should be:
(Wikimedia Commons)
- Love
- Joy
- Peace
- Patience
- Kindness
- Goodness
- Long-suffering
- Gentleness
- Meekness
- Faith
- Modesty
- Self-control
- Patience
As a friend recently commented, “sarcasm is not a fruit of the spirit.”
What can sarcasm lead to?
Belittling of an individual.
Is that acceptable for people who should be studying this verse:
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32 ESV)?
Years ago while attending a “welcome picnic” at our new church, I told an outrageously ridiculous story to our new pastor.
He smiled politely at my brilliant comment–which had a question mark full of sarcasm at the end asking for agreement.
After a moment he said, “I don’t know you well enough. Are you joking or being serious?”
Photo by Charl Durand (Unsplash)
Mortified at that moment.
(I then explained the joke and he laughed.)
I have tried to be careful with my speech ever since.
The Open Bible lists 42 verses about speaking the truth to one another, loving one another, and watching what comes out of your mouth–particularly, “I am only joking.” (Proverbs 26:18-19)
It’s particularly a problem with children–who don’t have any world experience to inoculate them against personal humor at their expense.
I watched an eight-year-old deflate before my eyes as her brothers, father, and mother teased her about an, admittedly, obvious question.
It was the pile-on that disturbed me, and which finally led to her bursting into tears. “But what is the answer?”
Her confusion haunts me. I try to gently answer all questions asked by children, now, as a result.
Are sarcasm or cynicism ever warranted?
Look, my favorite form of humor is irony.
I get it–how funny it is when someone says something and then does the opposite.
I laugh all the time.
But, while I appreciate humor sites like The Babylon Bee, I simply can’t read them.
I never felt good when I laughed at their irony, it felt too personal.
Afterwards, my laughter clawed at my soul–no matter how deserving the story.
Here’s the issue for me:
While I can laugh at a situation–assuming no one gets hurt–I can’t laugh at a person.
People, even ones we don’t like or disagree with, are made in the imago dei, the image of God.
Photo by Stefan Cosma (Unsplash)
He loves them. He wants the best for all His children.
God doesn’t want people being made fun of if it shreds or could destroy their souls.
Look at those definitions again: “to express contempt or ridicule.” “Jaded negativity.”
(Contempt=despising, disrespect. Ridicule=mock, make fun of. Jaded=dull, cynical. Negativity=disagreeable, negative).
Did you see that in Jesus’ interactions?
Well, yes, a few times, particularly in Matthew 23.
As writer Jayson D. Bradley notes, however,
But this wasn’t really about individual Pharisees, this was a problem with the pharisaical system. And any sincerely religious Pharisee would have had to agree with Him.
Speaking in generalities is another polemic that’s frowned upon, but let’s be honest; it’s an extremely effective rhetorical device—especially for people trapped within a broken system.
Relevant Magazine; 4 Times Jesus Used Sarcasm to Make a Point
NOT geared at the individual. Jesus’ points were at a system.
Besides (contrary to popular belief–wait, is that sarcastic?), I cannot read people’s hearts like Jesus can.
What are the results in others’ lives if we use sarcasm against them?
Look at your own life. How does it make you feel when you are the butt of someone’s joke?
Sometimes we make mistakes. Do we really want people to laugh at us with a mean, vindictive spirit?
I suspect the line between sarcasm, cynicism, and humor lies somewhere in each person’s heart.
The Holy Spirit knows.
I trust the Holy Spirit, more than myself, to know when to laugh, apologize, or turn away.
Lately, I’ve been turning away a lot more than in the past.
Everyone else will have to deal with their own heart before their Creator.
Thanks be to God.
Tweetables
Sarcasm, cynicism, and the Christian. Where’s the line? Click to Tweet
What’s at the heart of sarcasm for a Christian? Click to Tweet
Isn’t it fantastic,
that bold and cutting wit,
the light-footed sarcastic?
Well, no, friend, not a bit
for it only serves to tear
down that which should be built,
to show we really do not care
when other blood is spilt.
Sarcasm is expression
of ego in the highest place,
above apology, confession,
above a need to offer grace
that even as laughter appears
is more about inducing tears.
Ah, Andrew, I’ve missed you! And yes, to your poetry. 🙁
Ouch! Yes, I know exactly what you’re talking about, Michelle. I can be quite good (bad, actually) at the barbed response to “put someone in their place.”
Fortunately, some decades ago, I realized how hurtful some of my repartee could be. Yes, quick, witty, made people laugh, but if at the expense of someone else … Not so good. I vowed to change but old habits are hard to break. Nevertheless, I kept at it and am mostly successful.
Thanks for a necessary discussion.
Alas, too many fingers were pointing back at me, too. 🙁
I have not ever heard anyone say these things although they need to be said! You are right on the mark and so is Andrew. How can I be approachable when I belittle those whom Jesus died for? Sarcasm is absolutely void of humility and cynicism is a bad attitude towards circumstances that God has allowed.